If you’ve ever felt abandoned by a parent or guardian in your life; like you may have missed out on some things growing up as a child because of a parent(s) not being there, then you are not alone. I am here to tell you that there is hope.
I grew up in a single parent home. It was just me, my mom and two older brothers. Growing up as a little girl wasn’t so bad. I mean we had some challenges here and there, some good times and some bad, but what family doesn’t. Overall, we had a lot to be grateful to God for.
Growing up without a father around had its disadvantages, I guess. My natural father was around in the early part of my life until I was about 7 or 8 years old. He wasn’t that involved in my life then. Unfortunately, things didn’t work out between he and my mom, and when he left out of our lives, he was gone for good.
I never saw him again. I don’t have old photos of my dad anywhere. If I were to look him in his face now, I wouldn’t know it’s him. I was too young to even remember what he looked like. Not even a photographic memory!
I had my moments where I questioned why he left. What was wrong with me or what did I do, that caused him to leave and not want to see me again. Of course feelings of rejection begin to creep in.
I have forgiven my dad for walking out of our lives. Not sure what was going on in his life at that time, but I have prayed for him, believing that he knows the Lord for himself. God is so good and loves us so much. I know He he forgave my dad and loves him more than I ever could. My mom holds a very special place in my heart. I love and honor her so much for giving her all to raise us. To the best of her ability, she raised three children without a dad around. I love that she always gives credit to God for enabling her to do so. But looking back now, I realize that God kept us and protected us from a lot of heartache and pain.
To make a long story short, let me fast forward to an experience I recently had this year in 2017. Just to show you how God knows how to step in and turn things around in our lives.
A very well known and prominent leader came to the Chicago land area in August for an event that is held annually. This year was very special to me in so many ways. One was because I was blessed and honored to be a part of the event as a greeter. Another was meeting new people, and connecting with friends. It was amazing! I was also able to sit in on the meetings to hear the word.
That final evening of the event, I got a chance to meet this prominent leader. He was a very humble, and down to earth person. I briefly shared with him how his teachings had impacted my life, as well as being a graduate of the school he founded. After we talked briefly, I took a picture with him and then proceeded to the back of the auditorium to my seat.
When I got there, I noticed that one of my classmates was heading toward the back in my direction. When he came over to me, he said that there was a vacant seat up front beside him and his wife, and that I could come up and sit with them. At first, I thought, no I should stay where I am. I wanted to be to myself, but the Holy Spirit said to go up and sit with them. So, I did!
The praise and worship portion of the event had begun. The place was filled with so many people, so much energy and excitement. I began to feel overwhelmed with a warm presence. I knew it was God! His presence and love overflowed me as we were singing songs of adoration to Him. I began to weep so much. My heart was so full, and I could just feel His love all over me.
I felt my soul was being healed and restored little by little from the pain, disappointments, discouragement I had experienced in years past and in my life then.
As I continued crying, I just closed my eyes. I saw in this vision a man sitting in this chair. Afterwards, I saw this little girl coming towards him. As she was coming closer to him, her eyes were fixed on him and his eyes were fixed on her as he was reaching out for her. I felt that there was this connection between them that could not be broken.
Then I saw her sitting on his lap, and then she laid her head on the right side of his chest. He began to wrap his arms around her as to comfort her. He spoke words of love and comfort to her. “I love you my precious little girl. I am pleased with you. I am here for you. Rest in my love for you.”
The Holy Spirit showed me that I was that little girl, resting in the loving arms of God. I missed that growing up. My natural father probably didn’t know how to show me that, but God showed me. Until now, I never knew what it was like to experience the love and affection of a father. Father God was showing me that He was always there for me.
During this time of the event, He told me that the Holy Spirit was going to paint more pictures of what the Father’s love looks like to me on my heart, and that it would be in many forms. So I just continued to cry like a baby, being totally filled with joy and set free. Set free from thoughts and feelings of rejection, abandonment, low self esteem, and failure; to knowing that I am very much loved, accepted, wanted and never alone.
I will never forget that time in my life. It will always serve as a reminder to me of how present and how intimate and loving and caring God is.
I want to bring comfort to you if you did not or are not experiencing the joy of having a relationship with either of your parents. You are not alone, nor are you rejected and unwanted. You are loved and accepted by God. No one can love you like our God can. He loves you so much. He is and will always be there for you, no matter what. There is not a time in your life that you can’t go to God, and there isn’t a time that you are never on His mind. You are God’s favorite. You are God’s favorite! You are greatly loved and He promises to never leave you nor forsake you.
In no way am I belittling what we went through without either parent(s) in our lives, but I once heard a preacher say “what your parents didn’t teach you, God will.”
Our parents are not perfect and don’t have all the answers. They did their best.
When we allow Father God to come into our hearts and persuade us of His love for us, then healing, restoration, wholeness and new beginnings can begin.
You don’t have to look for love in all the wrong places either, when you have the love of God within your reach.
If you are struggling with forgiving a parent(s) for abandoning you, ask the Father to help you to understand things from their perspective; whatever that may be. Ask Him to help you make that step of forgiving and releasing them, and He will.
If you have a parent who is still in your life, but there are issues between you, ask Father God to show you, when the time is right, how to reconcile the relationship. He will!
Forgiveness is a vital part of any relationship. God has forgiven us and therefore has empowered us to forgive others. I am a firm believer that God is a God of relationships and that He is not in the business of destroying families, but restoring them.
If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to do so at the end of my blog. I would love to share and pray with you.
Here are a few scriptures to chew on as a reminder that God has not forgotten you. He has promised to never leave us nor forsake us.
Psalm 27:10 Although my father and my mother have forsaken me, yet the Lord will take me up [adopt me as His child].
Romans 8:16 The Spirit Himself [thus] testifies together with our own spirit, [assuring us] that we are children of God.
Ephesians 2:4 But God–so rich is He in His mercy! Because of and in order to satisfy the great and wonderful and intense love with which He loved us,
Hebrews 13:5 Let your character or moral disposition be free from love of money [including greed, avarice, lust, and craving for earthly possessions] and be satisfied with your present [circumstances and with what you have]; for He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!]
Till next time, rest in His love.